Set Goals and Priorities......

This area is so big and so overwhelming that I haven’t been able to tackle it (it’s taken nearly two weeks!!!) But with Deb from SYL Challenge’s guidance on goal setting, I hope that my goals are both attainable and covers enough areas so that by the end of 2012, my Wheel of Life looks a bit healthier!!!!

First of all, an important goal (or the most time important) is my goal to lose 10kg by the end of April 2012. I am not overly overweight, but I do need to lose (I feel) around 10kg, so that when my husband and I try to for another baby (which is coming around quite soon!!!) that I am a bit healthier and fitter to go through another pregnancy.

The second most important goal for me right now, is to spend one on one time with each family member so that we all know that we are important and loved. This also includes nurturing the relationship with my husband! This could be small things like a walk every night, or a movie date with only one child at a time. I don’t want this to be a big deal, but more small and inexpensive things to do together. I would hope to aim for at least a one on one outing once a fortnight.

Thirdly, to maintain a clean and tidy home, as I know I am a calmer and happier person and I feel that everything is under control when the house is clean. This also includes keeping up with the ironing (the number one job that I hate!!!!!)

My fourth goal is perhaps a funny goal to have (especially at number 4), is to stop writing TO DO LISTS and actually DO THE THINGS ON THE LIST!!!!!!!!! I am going to try and write one list a month and do everything on it. The list I will make will be attainable and I will strive very hard to complete the list every month!!!!

Number five on my goals and priority list, would be to slow down. My life feels like it is running at 100 miles an hour and I really want and need it to slow down. I want to increase my time spent outside, by walking or gardening and I want to start a compost bin and to spend time in my husband’s vegetable garden. I hope to have begun a compost bin and a small garden by the end of March 2012.

Six.... phew the list is getting longer!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I would like to start having extended family ‘catch up’ days at least once every two months. I feel very disconnected from my brothers and sisters lately as we all have very busy lives, but family is a number one priority and importance to me, so I want to try and repair these relationships. I hope that a regular catch up with everyone would be a small step in the right direction!!! I aim to have had the first ‘catch up’ by the end of March 2012.

NUMBER SEVEN!!!! To make new friendships and reconnect with the old. It’s hard when you have a new baby, you think you have heaps of time, when in reality you have NONE!!!! My baby girl is about to turn one in March and I feel very isolated (and have down for a few months now) and I really want this feeling to GO AWAY!!!! I hope that this year I meet some new people, with little ones, and I am going to try achieve this by stepping out of my comfort zone and GO TO PLAYGROUPS!!!!! Ohhhhhh scary scary thought but I will go and I will try!!!!!! I also want to reconnect with my old friends, they are important to me and they are obviously in my life for a reason, and I think they need some nurturing to get back the closeness once shared!! I aim to at least meet face to face once a month with an old friend!!!

Goal number eight is a personal goal, for both career and personal growth. I started a photography course at the end of 2011, but as usual life got in the way and the study took a back seat. I am setting myself the goal of completing this course by the end of 2012!!!! This will enable me to get more out of my love of photography and maybe add a source of income if I choose to take my photography to the next level.

Goal nine is to read at least one book and watch a movie a month!!! I love reading and have books everywhere and lists of books I want to read or movies to see, but I never seem to have time!! I want to MAKE time to read and watch movies!!!!

Goal number ten perhaps should be way up the top at number one or two, but it’s here and I hope that by progressing and working on all my other goals, Number Ten may just fall into place!! I would like to have a happier and healthier family by the end of 2012!!!! Not going to specify anything here, just hope to see some changes J

 
So these goals are actually quite daunting now that I have written them in a list form (which I actually said I WOULD NOT DO!!!!). But I will not be deterred. I am going to try and I will commit some time and patience into achieving them.

Probably the first and best place to start would be to draw up a time chart or timetable of sorts, so I am able to see WHERE I spend my time and WHERE I could fit in these new great ideas and hopes into my life.......    HERE I GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just breathing.......

Ahhhhhhh, a week to just breathe!!! Thanks deb for the week to just take it all in and take stock of what we have done in the last few weeks.

This week’s break came at a perfect time for my family. It was the last week of Victorian school holidays and so as we count down to school starting on Monday I really needed to get ready!! We decluttered all of the kids clothes and went shopping for everything they needed (and in some cases for stuff they didn’t need)!!

We played board games (as there is not much time in the school term), we walked and talked, and I got the house kind of under control..... although I am looking forward to next week when I can actually get ON TOP of everything and get my house back into a routine and order so we can all function through what is a called the school term (or chaos!!!!)

I have loved these school holidays, I have been able to spend time with my all of my kids without working or rushing around. I have been able to sit back and enjoy their company and be quite amazed and proud, especially of my son who turned 11 over the holidays. He has grown into a gorgeous young boy and is so smart and clever and beautiful and caring and...... I could really go on!!! My love for him has really blossomed and I am so proud. I am also sad, he has grown so tall and quite often sits around the house in just his footy shorts – ahhhh it scares me to think that he will soon be a teenager and a young man - ?????!!!?????!!!?????!!!!??????? so for now I will have to steal big hugs while he will give them to me!!!!!

It also gave me a chance to sit back and have a read through some other great challenge posts.... I am soo grateful to have joined this challenge, it has allowed my thoughts to get into some kind of order and get out of my head, and it’s also opened up my life to other great women who are all on similar wavelengths to me....... I am loving making connections with others!!!

 Ahhhhhh so as I think about returning to normality on Monday, I am quite calm and excited to think about what the 2012 school year is going to hold. My oldest is starting Grade 5 and my second, Grade 4, so we are accustomed to the school term routine, but it’s still quite emotional for me on the first day when I drop them at school and they walk (run) away from me towards their friends and new experiences...... I will probably still shed a small tear – I can’t help it!!!!

My Wheel of Life - January 2012

So this weeks challenge was kind of easy.....mmmm or I am getting used to thinking about my life and what I want to achieve a nice balance???

The Wheel of Life illustration, below is kind of sad :( but that's OK because I know my family and I need improving!!

So, lets have a look.

Family Environment - 2. This category covers our household and how it functions. At its best things run smoothly - at its worst I turn into Godzilla and the mood is quite low. I would like to see this category at least get up to a four........

Family Relationships - 2. This category covers all relationships, both immediate and extended. This is an area that caused me alot of pain and consumed me (in a bad way) last year. So I am really hoping this area can increase GREATLY!!!

Spirit/Peace - 2. This category covers MY calm and my PEACE. I would also like to include in this category our religion. We are catholics - but not practising. My children attend a catholic school and attend mass regularly but as a family we fall down in this area :( hopefully this year we can find time and attend mass together regularly.

Community/Friendships - 3. This category covers both our small community and my friendships with my friends. As having a new baby takes up ALOT of time, my friends have taken a back seat (some understand, some don't) I hope this year to reconnect with my friends and maybe make some new ones who are at the same stage of life as me (with a small baby).

Recreation - kids - 4. This area of our life is HUGE!!!!!! My children are very involved in extra curricular activities (their choice) and I am proud that they are involved in various sports or community groups. It is also the major area of our time, running from one thing to the next and most nights to two or more activities and then I have to fit in a healthy dinner and a bed time that is acceptable ......... yes sometimes this is not possible!!! Hopefully this year we can balance out more, by finding better routines or??????/

Recreation - family - 3. This area of our life is quite good. Perhaps the kids would prefer it was a five, but I don't think this is going to happen!!!! I think of this category as our family outings.holidays etc. Maybe at the end of the year this could maybe be a 4......

Healthy Lifestyle - 2.  Grrrrr this category is a hard one for me!!!! I want our family to enjoy healthier options for dinner and especially the children for lunches!!! I HATE SCHOOL LUNCHES!!!! So this area really needs some work :)

Simpler Lifestyle - 3. This category covers the need for me to slow down!!! I always dream of a life where we have a big vegetable garden and animals surrounding us. Some land for the kids to run free and views that relax you by just being there....... a dream yes, but maybe i could learn how to incorporate smaller things into my life now........

So overall my wheel of life needs alot of work..... bring on 2012!!!!!!!!!!! And finally, this quote is going to help me

as everyone who I have come across through this challenge has already lifted me up and I look forward to the next 48 weeks :)

Our Family Hopes

This week’s task to create a family mission statement is terrifying me!!! So much so that I have ignored it all week and now I am faced with the fact that it’s Saturday and I had better hurry up!!!! It’s scary, as up until now I have not told anyone about the SYL Challenge or even my blog, not even my husband, and to complete this task to its best I needed his, and my family’s input.

So, after broaching the subject during the week with my husband (I gave him time to think) I let the whole thing slide........ but............ the time came this afternoon, and it had to be done!

We were all casually sitting around and I thought instead of having a formal family meeting (as my kids HATE them and they are never productive!!!) I started casually asking questions – and to my surprise they stopped what they were doing and cooperated J

BUT it was a stressful, painful, annoying, hard..... I could go on, hour!! I am still all uptight from the experience!!!! So after gardening for awhile and trying to unwind and let it all go, here I am, cuppa, chocolate, baby sooking in the background, kids watching tv - loudly, some more chocolate, and I am going to try put together our FAMILY HOPES – the kids didn’t really understand ‘mission statement’ and we like the below quote, so we decided to call it our FAMILY HOPES.......

My family is made up of myself, my husband, my son (11) and two daughters (9 years and 10 months). So what possible answers could we all come up with to describe us???

There was also Mean and Rude – from my nine (going on 15) year old daughter who dislikes me at the moment!!

These words do describe us and looking back over my values from week 2, everything seems to all fit in together.

So after a looooong (well it felt it) discussion we all decided that in 2012 we wanted more family activities, both structured and unstructured, more family holidays (not sure how we could squeeze in any more, we already enjoy LOTS of getaways together), more relaxation, and more happiness! Yep, well that’s all well and good – but how do we get there????

Everyone agreed that the following needed improving for us to achieve any relaxation or happiness: Manners (hard nut to crack when we have hormones raging left right and centre!!!), Helping around the house (whoo hoo I will not argue with this one) and A Meal Planner that we all have input to and mum sticks to!

So we are all feeling quite happy with ourselves and I am hoping that we are covering enough ground for me to form some kind of “FAMILY HOPES”. Whilst the momentum was going my husband decided we should tackle the Meal Planning list, so we did – like I said earlier this has been a painful experience!! I take my hat off to all those families who have family meetings and can all sit down quietly and happily and discuss.......

So, where are we??? Yes, our   “FAMILY HOPES”.   Ok, here we are:

As a family we are at our best when we are on holidays.

We will try to prevent times when mum is tired.

We will find more time with each other to take part in family activities - both structured and unstructured.

We will help each family member by talking nice, not talking back and no yelling.

We will help others by including our neighbours and friends in our everyday lives so we may be there in their time of need.

We will stop procrastinating and start working on: Watching our manners and helping around the house.

We will be viewed as a family that is Loving, Helpful, Friendly, Caring and Family Orientated.

We will fill our home with HAPPINESS.

We will make choices and decisions based on: Trust, Honesty, Love, Patience, Helpfulness, and Friendliness.

We will constantly renew ourselves by focusing on: family walks, acknowledging god in our everyday lives and try to attend mass as a family, give each other space when needed and extra love and support if that is what we need, be there for a hug ANYTIME and always encourage friendships.

PHEW, I hope we are going to get there!!! Really looking over this, we do all try our hardest to get along, and we do function as a great family unit 99% of the time. I guess if the kids can understand that by helping even a small amount, I am not sooooo tired and cranky and the house is much more relaxed. AND I guess if I know the kids are tired and just want some space, I should learn not to not nag J!!!!!

Ok, so this challenge wasn’t all bad. I am relaxed now that I have written this post and I am feeling all in love with my family again! Amazing what chocolate can do!!!

Getting to the core of the true me.......

When asked "what do you believe in?" or "what are you passionate about" I think everyone answers a standard answer, oh my family, my job,  the church, sport etc.... but when Deb from Simplify your life asked us to dig deeper  (http://www.homelifesimplified.com.au/simplify-your-life-week-2-define-your-personal-values/) I was 'stuck'.

I am passionate about my family, which includes my immediate, my extended and my non-blood family, who have been there for me through thick and thin. I am most happy when organising any family event or get together. I love the feeling of being able to provide for and be surrounded at the same time by everyone whom i love and cherish dearly. I am most passionate about being a mum. It is my all and I could think of nothing else or nowhere else I would rather be. I enjoy and feel energised through my children. I very rarely miss a sporting game, school event or friend play date. I am totally involved in their everyday life and their feelings. As they get older I am sad to think that I must let go of this and let them go along their own path.

I am inspired by other women especially mums who seem to have so much going on in their lives and yet the still do the extra. I strive to be that mum........ but I am pretty sure that other mums probably look at my life and think that I am one of those mums who is always doing the extra and seem to have it all together!!! 

I am inspired by people who know what they want in life and just go after it. Could I ever be this person??

But what is at the centre of me?? It is actually quite hard to describe and narrow down, and ‘my list’ is quite surprising to me. But, my personal values........ in summary, right now, would be:

Commitment, Love, Family, Nurturing, Loyalty, Resilience, Devotion, Happiness, Acceptance, Dependable, Trustworthiness, Generosity, Listening, Intuition, Dedication and Patience (but this is something i want!!)

And looking at this shortened list, I believe that if any of my friends were asked to describe me, they would use many of these words!!

My most important, or my

would be

 Family, Nurturing, Commitment, Loyalty and Resilience.

And even though there are five from a long list, I still value much more, and each value can be intertwined together in all of my decision making and my beliefs.

This post has really confirmed in my heart that my family and my current position as a stay at home mum is exactly where I am supposed to be, its exactly what i need right now to ensure my happiness and to be ‘true’ to me.

Who Am I?

I thought it best to start this challenge off with a small explanation of who I am 'right now' - TODAY, so in 52 weeks time I can see (hopefully) how far I have come!!

Today 9 January 2012, I AM a Mum, Wife, Sister, Daughter, Aunt, Sister In Law, Friend, Work Colleague, Student, Daughter In Law, Cousin, Neighbour and within each of these I am many more - such as cook, cleaner, teacher, chauffeur, listener, mediator, lover, gardener, organiser ..... the list could go on!!!

But do any of these actually say 'Who I Am'?

YES, I am a mum to three beautiful children, all of whom make me smile, laugh, cry, love and learn all in their own ways. They test my patience and stretch my energy levels beyond belief and just when I think I cannot go on they lift my spirits and make me love and remind me what life is all about and give me moments to treasure for ever.

YES, I am a wife to a fantastic man, who is my partner in everything and continually keeps me grounded and calm. In my dreams I wouldn't have imagined sharing my life with someone as so supportive, loving, caring and tender as him.

YES, I am a sister to two grown women and one man who have all taken different paths within their lives, coming together every now and then to celebrate the bond that is family. I am also a sister in law to three more beautiful women and two men who each also share a big part of my life and heart.

YES, I am a daughter to a great mum and dad who gave me the great gift of a happy, safe and memorable childhood. And I also have the privilege of being a daughter in law to another mum and dad whose relationship also plays an important role in my everyday life.

BUT.........

While I sit here pondering and writing this, I am still trying to see WHO I AM. All of these relationships combine to describe me and of course they all mix in to have created and continually change me and my self. But I don't know who I am.

I AM A THIRTY SOMETHING STAY AT HOME MUM WHO HAS THREE BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN (10, 9 & 10 MONTHS) AND HOPES FOR MORE LITTLE TREASURES IN THE COMING YEARS. I AM A LAW CLERK - BUT DON'T REALLY ENJOY IT ANYMORE AND I AM A GREAT FRIEND. I AM AN OVER ACHIEVER AND ALWAYS TAKE ON TOO MUCH. I AM EASILY STRESSED AND UNFORTUNATELY LATELY, HAVE LITTLE PATIENCE. I AM LOW ON ENERGY AND MOTIVATION AND I THINK IF I DIG DEEP I AM PROBABLY LOW ON SELF LOVE

I am everything in this post and so much more,

Everything that went “right” in 2011

As this is the first challenge of  http://www.homelifesimplified.com.au/52-weeks-to-simplify-your-life-syl-week-1/    and also my first ever blog....... it could be very interesting!!!!

What went right in 2011........ this is actually harder to answer than I first thought!! So here I go.....

• the safe arrival of my second beautiful daughter - Mackenzie. As she was my third child I really enjoyed the birthing experience and tried to 'soak' her in as I really know how quick babies grow into children - my first baby is turning 11 very shortly :(
• I fell in love with my husband all over again!!
• My children were healthy and happy
• We enjoyed a relaxing big holiday as a family

I am sure there are many many more!! But I am starting to struggle :)

What am I Grateful for?

• Family
• Friends
• My loving and very supportive husband
• My beautiful home tucked away in a gorgeous spot of the world!
• My health

What excited me?

I have always loved photography and always thought about learning how to, but as usual I put everyone else first and thought there is never enough time to fit in MY things...... BUT at the end of 2011 I made the decision to jump head first into a photography course YAY!!! I'm finding it hard to fit it in and have only submitted the first assignment (passed with an 8/10 whoo hoo) but I know I will get there!!!

I am sure I could really keep going, but just writing this much as lifted my spirits and I am excited to be starting something new in 2012!!! Thank you for allowing me to follow such an exciting challenge!!

:)